The much needed around here --- Satire Alert! ---
Responsibility Missing from Gulf Coast, Bush Took It
by
Scott Ott
(2005-09-14) -- After two weeks of speculation about what happened to personal responsibility on the Gulf Coast in the wake of Hurricane Katrina, President George Bush finally
admitted yesterday that he has taken it.
"
...to the extent that the federal government didn't fully do its job right, I take responsibility," the president
told reporters at a news conference as he stood next to Iraqi President Jalal Talabani.
New Orleans Mayor Ray Nagin and Louisiana Gov. Kathleen Blanco, who first alerted Americans to the absence of
responsibility, issued a joint statement downplaying the significance of the Bush announcement.
"Now that the president has taken responsibility, he can keep it," the Democrat leaders said. "We don't have much use for it in state and local government. After years of benevolent Democrat leadership, most of our constituents think that it all lies in Washington anyway, so they won't even notice it was taken."
Meanwhile, some members of Congress called for an investigation.
"Bush's announcement that he takes responsibility is being spun to sound like something new," said one unnamed Democrat senator. "But we can see from his actions that he's been on-the-take for years. He didn't just take responsibility yesterday. He had it all along. I can certainly confirm that it was nowhere to be found in Congress. Our hands are clean."
