MonsterMark
Dedicated LVC Member
Tiger Woods can drive a golf ball 300 yards.
Difference between a golf ball and an Escalade
- Thread starter MonsterMark
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MonsterMark
Dedicated LVC Member
Did you hear about Pings new line of golf clubs?
They're called the Elin Woods and are guaranteed to beat Tiger.
They're called the Elin Woods and are guaranteed to beat Tiger.
MonsterMark
Dedicated LVC Member
The Tiger confession...
"I have let my family down and I regret those transgressions with all of my heart. I have not been true to my values and the behavior my family deserves. I am not without faults and I am far short of perfect. I am dealing with my behavior and personal failings behind closed doors with my family. Those feelings should be shared by us alone.
Although I am a well-known person and have made my career as a professional athlete, I have been dismayed to realize the full extent of what tabloid scrutiny really means. For the last week, my family and I have been hounded to expose intimate details of our personal lives. The stories in particular that physical violence played any role in the car accident were utterly false and malicious. Elin has always done more to support our family and shown more grace than anyone could possibly expect.
But no matter how intense curiosity about public figures can be, there is an important and deep principle at stake which is the right to some simple, human measure of privacy. I realize there are some who don't share my view on that. But for me, the virtue of privacy is one that must be protected in matters that are intimate and within one's own family. Personal sins should not require press releases and problems within a family shouldn't have to mean public confessions.
Whatever regrets I have about letting my family down have been shared with and felt by us alone. I have given this a lot of reflection and thought and I believe that there is a point at which I must stick to that principle even though it's difficult.
I will strive to be a better person and the husband and father that my family deserves. For all of those who have supported me over the years, I offer my profound apology."
"I have let my family down and I regret those transgressions with all of my heart. I have not been true to my values and the behavior my family deserves. I am not without faults and I am far short of perfect. I am dealing with my behavior and personal failings behind closed doors with my family. Those feelings should be shared by us alone.
Although I am a well-known person and have made my career as a professional athlete, I have been dismayed to realize the full extent of what tabloid scrutiny really means. For the last week, my family and I have been hounded to expose intimate details of our personal lives. The stories in particular that physical violence played any role in the car accident were utterly false and malicious. Elin has always done more to support our family and shown more grace than anyone could possibly expect.
But no matter how intense curiosity about public figures can be, there is an important and deep principle at stake which is the right to some simple, human measure of privacy. I realize there are some who don't share my view on that. But for me, the virtue of privacy is one that must be protected in matters that are intimate and within one's own family. Personal sins should not require press releases and problems within a family shouldn't have to mean public confessions.
Whatever regrets I have about letting my family down have been shared with and felt by us alone. I have given this a lot of reflection and thought and I believe that there is a point at which I must stick to that principle even though it's difficult.
I will strive to be a better person and the husband and father that my family deserves. For all of those who have supported me over the years, I offer my profound apology."
PetesSweets86
Dedicated LVC Member
lol never trust a man with lasik!!! they too can be bad drivers
maybe it's cause he's part asian that he crashed?
maybe it's cause he's part asian that he crashed?
Morbid Intentions
Well-Known LVC Member
since when does anyone have the right to know ANYONE'S private life... just wondering
people that pay this any attention are beyond retarded... the guy got chased by his crazy wife with a golf club, leave his ass be
people that pay this any attention are beyond retarded... the guy got chased by his crazy wife with a golf club, leave his ass be
topher5150
Dedicated LVC Member
it's kind of hard when it's one of the biggest things on the news
MonsterMark
Dedicated LVC Member
The guy was banging chicks from sea to shining sea. He should have been paying for discretion instead of picking up every babe he ran into.
I like the retarded part coming from a guy that likes to lick barbwire.
Morbid Intentions
Well-Known LVC Member
and?
this sh*t isn't news... it's just bullsh*t that people with no life think is news
so he likes to get his d*ck wet and has affairs, big deal
next please
lincolnx2
Dedicated LVC Member
This guy is doing what %75 of married men do, they have affairs, my stats may be fudged a little.
What were Tiger Woods and his wife doing out at 2.30 in the morning? They went Clubbing.
Tiger Woods crashed into a fire hydrant and a tree. He couldn't decide between a wood and an iron.
Tiger just changed his nickname but still kept it in the cat family--his new name? Cheetah.
Since Tiger drives an Escalade, can he blame the accident on his caddy? (hey, a LVC joke!)
Tiger Woods crashed into a fire hydrant and a tree. He couldn't decide between a wood and an iron.
Tiger just changed his nickname but still kept it in the cat family--his new name? Cheetah.
Since Tiger drives an Escalade, can he blame the accident on his caddy? (hey, a LVC joke!)
stlunatic
Well-Known LVC Member
i gotta agree with morbib on this one, regardless if its all over the news or not. who really cares about what happened? if the guy down the street was cheating on his wife how much of a crap would you give? not a big one? why does that change when were talking about a pro athlete?
BAD97LSC
Dedicated LVC Member
thats why i dont turn on the tv anymore. we are in a horrible waste of money war, and people you and i know are getting smoked all day long over there, and we care tiger crashed 5 feet from his house? who gives a :q:q:q:q about tiger woods, stick him in iraq with a gun then you can talk about him, otherwise what he does should not be on the news, it isnt news, this country is so :q:q:q:qing sad that we have to revolve around celebrities and when they go to the bathroom, what kind of toast they ate this morning, come on seriously?????????? :q:q:q:q tiger woods.
ground_zero298
Dedicated LVC Member
+1 who the hell really cares who tiger stuck his dick in. People cheat everyday, just a normal part of life for alot of people now adays. Pretty bad when this is the media's main story.
MonsterMark
Dedicated LVC Member
Tiger is now -7 under, in counseling, and his wife's attorney is having a blast rewriting his prenup.
All 7 babes are tall, fairly hot blondes.
All 7 babes are tall, fairly hot blondes.
Frogman
Dedicated LVC Member
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Bryan,
I hate to say this, but who cares, man? Let the poor bastage live his life. He's not a politician (whom, I know you love to go after), he's just an overpaid guy who can swing a stick and couldn't keep his pecker in check.
I'm sure you wouldn't want everyone digging into your personal life just because your wife beat the snot out of you. And we both know she can.
I did LOL at the jokes though.
I hate to say this, but who cares, man? Let the poor bastage live his life. He's not a politician (whom, I know you love to go after), he's just an overpaid guy who can swing a stick and couldn't keep his pecker in check.
I'm sure you wouldn't want everyone digging into your personal life just because your wife beat the snot out of you. And we both know she can.
I did LOL at the jokes though.
MonsterMark
Dedicated LVC Member
You can't go anywhere without news about being in your face.
But climategate, the greatest scandal in our history, media doesn't say a peep.
A usurper as President? Nobody gives a flying 'f' because the press annointed this guy and they will and have looked past every negative issue concerning 'The One'.
Tiger, he's now -7 under. He could be shooting his best round ever.
I can't wait to go to one of his tournaments and yell when he putts...
Get in the Ho!
But climategate, the greatest scandal in our history, media doesn't say a peep.
A usurper as President? Nobody gives a flying 'f' because the press annointed this guy and they will and have looked past every negative issue concerning 'The One'.
Tiger, he's now -7 under. He could be shooting his best round ever.
I can't wait to go to one of his tournaments and yell when he putts...
Get in the Ho!
MonsterMark
Dedicated LVC Member
• It sounds like Tiger put his driver in the wrong bag
• What's Tiger Wood's favorite club? His nightclub
• Phil Mickelson called Elin to get tips on how to beat Tiger.
• Tiger’s favorite course?... Intercourse
• Tiger Woods, the best Swinger in the world. Just Do It!
• Tiger is the first golfer to hit a water hazard and then a tree in the same drive!
• What's Tiger Wood's favorite club? His nightclub
• Phil Mickelson called Elin to get tips on how to beat Tiger.
• Tiger’s favorite course?... Intercourse
• Tiger Woods, the best Swinger in the world. Just Do It!
• Tiger is the first golfer to hit a water hazard and then a tree in the same drive!
MonsterMark
Dedicated LVC Member
When asked by the police how many times she hit Tiger, Elin replied:
"I'm not sure, put me down for a 5
"I'm not sure, put me down for a 5
ground_zero298
Dedicated LVC Member
Now your just trying to hard......
I do have to admit. Some of the jokes are pretty funny.
People like to watch a train wreck. Tiger not speaking with the PD just blew it up more. The rumormill got going. The media was having a fieldday trying to one up each other. Tiger the number one golfer in the world is "mortal". He cheated, got caught, his wife beat his ass. Moving on.
People like to watch a train wreck. Tiger not speaking with the PD just blew it up more. The rumormill got going. The media was having a fieldday trying to one up each other. Tiger the number one golfer in the world is "mortal". He cheated, got caught, his wife beat his ass. Moving on.
MonsterMark
Dedicated LVC Member
YouTube- Tiger Woods Voicemail Slow Jam Remix
Tiger's other women aren't mistresses. They're provisionals.
Did you hear Nike's new motto? Just do me.
Why is Steve Williams upset? He heard that Tiger needed to get a new Caddy!
If Elin really did whack Tiger a couple of times with a golf club, it would have been in line with the rules of golf: there's a 2-stroke penalty for playing the wrong hole.
Will Nike force Tiger to change his name to Cheetah?
Tiger's other women aren't mistresses. They're provisionals.
Did you hear Nike's new motto? Just do me.
Why is Steve Williams upset? He heard that Tiger needed to get a new Caddy!
If Elin really did whack Tiger a couple of times with a golf club, it would have been in line with the rules of golf: there's a 2-stroke penalty for playing the wrong hole.
Will Nike force Tiger to change his name to Cheetah?
