This is a story about a couple who had been happily
married for years. The only friction in their marriage
was the husband's habit of farting loudly every
morning when he awoke.
The noise would wake his wife and the smell would make
her eyes water and make her gasp for air. Every
morning she would plead with him to stop ripping them
off because it was making her sick. He told her he
couldn't stop it and that it was perfectly natural.
She told him to see a doctor; she was concerned that
one day he would blow his guts out.
The years went by and he continued to blast them out!
Then one Thanksgiving morning as she was preparing the
turkey for dinner and he was upstairs sound asleep,
she looked at the bowl where she had put the turkey
innards and neck, gizzard, liver and all the spare
parts and a malicious thought came to her.
She took the bowl and went upstairs where her husband
was sound asleep and, gently pulling back the bed
covers, she pulled back the elastic waistband of his
underpants and emptied the bowl of turkey guts into
his shorts.
Some time later she heard her husband awoke with his
usual trumpeting which was followed by a blood
curdling scream and the sound of frantic footsteps as
he ran into the bathroom. The wife could hardly
control herself as she rolled on the floor
laughing, tears in her eyes!
After years of torture she reckoned she had got him
back pretty good. About twenty minutes later, her
husband came downstairs in his bloodstained underpants
with a look of horror on his face. She bit her
lip as she asked him what was the matter.
He said, "Honey, you were right." "All these years you
have warned me and I didn't listen to you."
"What d o you mean?" asked his wife.
"Well, you always told me that one day I would end up
farting my guts out, and today it finally happened.
But by the grace of God, some Vaseline, and two
fingers, I think I got most of them back in."
married for years. The only friction in their marriage
was the husband's habit of farting loudly every
morning when he awoke.
The noise would wake his wife and the smell would make
her eyes water and make her gasp for air. Every
morning she would plead with him to stop ripping them
off because it was making her sick. He told her he
couldn't stop it and that it was perfectly natural.
She told him to see a doctor; she was concerned that
one day he would blow his guts out.
The years went by and he continued to blast them out!
Then one Thanksgiving morning as she was preparing the
turkey for dinner and he was upstairs sound asleep,
she looked at the bowl where she had put the turkey
innards and neck, gizzard, liver and all the spare
parts and a malicious thought came to her.
She took the bowl and went upstairs where her husband
was sound asleep and, gently pulling back the bed
covers, she pulled back the elastic waistband of his
underpants and emptied the bowl of turkey guts into
his shorts.
Some time later she heard her husband awoke with his
usual trumpeting which was followed by a blood
curdling scream and the sound of frantic footsteps as
he ran into the bathroom. The wife could hardly
control herself as she rolled on the floor
laughing, tears in her eyes!
After years of torture she reckoned she had got him
back pretty good. About twenty minutes later, her
husband came downstairs in his bloodstained underpants
with a look of horror on his face. She bit her
lip as she asked him what was the matter.
He said, "Honey, you were right." "All these years you
have warned me and I didn't listen to you."
"What d o you mean?" asked his wife.
"Well, you always told me that one day I would end up
farting my guts out, and today it finally happened.
But by the grace of God, some Vaseline, and two
fingers, I think I got most of them back in."
