mespock
Marxists - Socialists
No Child Left Behind in Sports Legislation The Federal government has announced that all high school sports teams must meet No Child Left Behind legislation beginning next season. Here are some of the new rules.
1. All kids will be expected to have the same athletic skills at the same time and in the same conditions. There will be no exceptions for interest in the sport, desire to be in athletics, genetic abilities or disabilities.... ALL KIDS WILL PLAY THEIR SPORT AT A PROFICIENT LEVEL.
2. Talented players will be asked to work out on their own without instruction, because the coaches will be using all their instructional time with the athletes that aren't interested in their sport, have limited athletic ability, and whose parents don't care about sports.
3. Sporting events will be played year round, but statistics will only be kept in 4th, 8th, and 11th grades.
4. In sporting events, no team will be declared a winner, as that will leave 50% of participants behind.
5. All high schools will be divided into districts with eight teams per district. Every team must finish at least 3rd place to be proficient.
6. All teams must score at least the same number of points that they allow, thus avoiding one team being less proficient than the other.
7. No tournaments will be held as this would result in one champion, thus making the other teams less proficient.
8. All teams must make the state playoffs, and all will win the championship. If a team does not win the championship, they will be on probation until they are the champions, and coaches will be held accountable.
This will create a New Age of sports where every school is expected to have the same level of talent and all teams will reach the same minimal goals. If no child gets ahead, then no child will be left behind. -- Non scholae, sed vitae, discimus! (We learn not for school, but for life!)
1. All kids will be expected to have the same athletic skills at the same time and in the same conditions. There will be no exceptions for interest in the sport, desire to be in athletics, genetic abilities or disabilities.... ALL KIDS WILL PLAY THEIR SPORT AT A PROFICIENT LEVEL.
2. Talented players will be asked to work out on their own without instruction, because the coaches will be using all their instructional time with the athletes that aren't interested in their sport, have limited athletic ability, and whose parents don't care about sports.
3. Sporting events will be played year round, but statistics will only be kept in 4th, 8th, and 11th grades.
4. In sporting events, no team will be declared a winner, as that will leave 50% of participants behind.
5. All high schools will be divided into districts with eight teams per district. Every team must finish at least 3rd place to be proficient.
6. All teams must score at least the same number of points that they allow, thus avoiding one team being less proficient than the other.
7. No tournaments will be held as this would result in one champion, thus making the other teams less proficient.
8. All teams must make the state playoffs, and all will win the championship. If a team does not win the championship, they will be on probation until they are the champions, and coaches will be held accountable.
This will create a New Age of sports where every school is expected to have the same level of talent and all teams will reach the same minimal goals. If no child gets ahead, then no child will be left behind. -- Non scholae, sed vitae, discimus! (We learn not for school, but for life!)
