perhaps if she could SEE the keyboard it may help...
i found this while doing a Limewire Document search for resume - i kinda collect them to compare layout and spelling. perhaps i am in need of a hobby. i am not a Bush hater so i do not view this as my point of view - just a funny resume.
George W. Bush
The White House, USA
EDUCATION AND EXPERIENCE
* LAW ENFORCEMENT: I was arrested in Kennebunkport, Maine in 1976 for driving under the influence of alcohol. I pled guilty, paid
a fine, and had my driver's license suspended for 30 days. My Texas driving record has been "lost" and is not available.
* MILITARY: I joined the Texas Air National Guard and went AWOL. I refused to take a drug test or answer any questions about my drug use. By joining
the Texas Air National Guard, I was able to avoid combat duty in Vietnam.
* COLLEGE: I graduated from Yale University. I was a cheerleader.
PAST WORK EXPERIENCE:
* I ran for U.S. Congress and lost.
* I began my career in the oil business in Midland, Texas in 1975. I bought an oil company, but couldn't find any oil in Texas. The
company went bankrupt shortly after I sold all my stock.
* I bought the Texas Rangers baseball team in a sweetheart deal that took land using taxpayer money.
* With the help of my father and our right-wing friends in the oil industry (including Enron CEO Ken Lay), I was elected Governor of Texas.
ACCOMPLISHMENTS AS GOVERNOR:
* I changed Texas pollution laws to favor power and
oil companies, making Texas the most polluted state in the Union.
* During my tenure, Houston replaced Los Angeles as the most smog-ridden city in America.
* I cut taxes and bankrupted the Texas treasury to the tune of billions in borrowed money.
* I set the record for the most executions by any Governor in American history.
* With the help of my brother, the Governor of Florida, and my father's appointments to the Supreme Court, I became
President after losing by over 500,000 votes.
ACCOMPLISHMENTS AS PRESIDENT:
* I invaded and occupied two countries at a continuing cost of over one billion dollars per week.
* I spent the U.S. surplus and effectively bankrupted the U.S. Treasury.
* I shattered the record for the largest annual deficit in U.S. history.
* I set an economic record for most private bankruptcies filed in any 12-month period.
* I set the all-time record for the biggest drop in the history of the U.S. stock market.
* I am the first president in U.S. history to enter office with a criminal record.
* I set the all-time record for most days on vacation in any one year period.
* After taking-off the entire month of August, I presided over the worst security failure in U.S. history.
* I am supporting development of a nuclear "Tactical Bunker Buster," a WMD.
* In my State Of The Union Address, I lied about our reasons for attacking Iraq, then blamed the lies on our British friends.
* I set the record for most campaign fund-raising trips by a U.S. president.
* In my first year in office over 2-million Americans lost their jobs and that trend
continues every month.
* I set the all-time record for most foreclosures in a 12-month period.
* I appointed more convicted criminals to administration than any president in U.S. history.
* I set the record for least amount of press conferences than any president since the advent of television.
* I presided over the biggest energy crisis in U.S. history and refused to intervene when corruption involving the oil industry
was revealed.
* I presided over the highest gasoline prices in U.S. history. * I have cut health care benefits for war veterans
and support a cut in duty benefits for active duty troops and their families-in war time.
* I have set the all-time record for most people worldwide to simultaneously protest me in public venues (15 million people)
shattering the record for protest against any person in the history ofmankind.
* I've broken more international treaties than any president in U.S. history.
* I'm proud that the members of my cabinet are the richest of any administration in U.S. history. My "poorest
millionaire," Condoleezza Rice, has a Chevron oil tanker named after her.
* I am the first president in U.S. history to order an unprovoked, pre-emptive attack and the military occupation of a sovereign
nation. I did so against the will of the United Nations, the majority of U.S.citizens, and the world community.
* I created the Ministry of Homeland Security, the largest bureaucracy in the history of the United States government.
* I am the first president in U.S. history to have the United Nations remove the U.S. from the Human Rights Commission.
* I withdrew the U.S. from the World Court of Law.
* I refused to allow inspectors access to U.S.prisoners of war (detainees) and thereby have refused to abide by the Geneva
Convention.
* I am the first president in history to refuse United Nations election inspectors (during the 2002 U.S. election).
* I am the all-time U.S. and world record-holder forreceiving the most corporate campaign donations.
* My largest lifetime campaign contributor, and one of my best friends, Kenneth Lay, presided over the largest corporate
bankruptcy fraud in U.S. history. My political party used the Enron private jets and corporate attorneys to assure my success with the U.S. Supreme
Court during my election decision. I have protected my friends at Enron and
Halliburton against investigation or prosecution. More time and money was spent investigating the Monica Lewinsky affair than has been spent
investigating one of the biggest corporate rip-offs in history.
* I garnered the most sympathy for the U.S. after the World Trade Center attacks and less than a year later made the U.S. the most hated country
in the world, the largest failure of diplomacy in world history.
* I am first president in history to have a majority of Europeans (71%)view my presidency as the biggest threat to world peace
and security.
* I changed the U.S. policy to allow convicted criminals to be awarded government contracts.
* I have so far failed to fulfill my pledge to bring Osama Bin Laden and Saddam Hussein to justice.
RECORDS AND REFERENCES:
* All records of my tenure as Governor of Texas are
now in my father's library, sealed, and unavailable for public view.
* All records of SEC investigations into my insider
trading and my bankrupt companies are sealed in secrecy and unavailable for
public view.
* All records or minutes from meetings that I, or my Vice-President,
attended regarding public energy policy are sealed in secrecy
and unavailable for public review.
Please consider my experience when voting in 2004
Send this to every voter you know.
Vote Quimby
