Dui - North Carolina Style

mespock

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Only a person in North Carolina could think of this. From Catawba County, where drunk driving is considered a sport, comes this true story.

Recently a routine police patrol parked outside a bar in Hickory, North Carolina. After last call the officer noticed a man leaving the bar so apparently intoxicated that he could barely walk. The man stumbled around the parking lot for a few minutes, with the officer quietly observing.

After what seemed an eternity, in which he tried his keys on five different vehicles, the man managed to find his car and fall into it. He sat there for a few minutes as a number of other patrons left the bar and drove off. Finally he started the car, switched the wipers on and off a few times; it was a fine, dry summer night, flicked the blinkers on and off a couple of times, honked the horn and then switched on the lights. He moved the vehicle forward a few inches, reversed a little and then remained still for a few more minutes as some more of the other patrons' vehicles left. At last, when his was the only car left in the parking lot, he pulled out and drove slowly down the road.

The police officer, having waited patiently all this time, now started up his patrol car, put on the flashing lights, promptly pulled the man over and administered a breathalyser test. To his utter amazement, the breathalyser indicated no evidence that the man had consumed any alcohol at all! Dumbfounded, the officer said, "I'll have to ask you to accompany me to the police station. This breathalyser equipment must be broken."

"I doubt it," said the truly proud Redneck. "Tonight I'm the designated decoy."
 
hahahahah hilarious!! we may need that strategy for the summer meet.
 
A Day Without Laughter Is A Day Wasted

A WOMAN was flying from Seattle to San Francisco. Unexpectedly, the plane was diverted to Sacramento along the way. The flight attendant explained that there would be a delay, and if the passengers wanted to get off the aircraft the plane would re-board in 50 minutes.

Everybody got off the plane except one lady who was blind. The man had noticed her as he walked by and could tell the lady was blind because her Seeing Eye dog lay quietly underneath the seats in front of her throughout the entire flight.


He could also tell she had flown this very flight before because the pilot approached her, and calling her by name, said, "Kathy, we are in
Sacramento for almost an hour. Would you like to get off and stretch your legs?" The blind lady replied, "No thanks, but maybe my dog would like to stretch his legs."

Picture this:


All the people in the gate area came to a complete standstill when they looked up and saw the pilot walk off the plane with a Seeing Eye dog!


The pilot was even wearing sunglasses. People scattered. They not only tried to change planes, but they were trying to change airlines!


True story.... Have a great day and remember... THINGS AREN'T ALWAYS AS THEY APPEAR.



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Only a person in North Carolina could think of this. From Catawba County, where drunk driving is considered a sport, comes this true story.

Recently a routine police patrol parked outside a bar in Hickory, North Carolina. After last call the officer noticed a man leaving the bar so apparently intoxicated that he could barely walk. The man stumbled around the parking lot for a few minutes, with the officer quietly observing.

After what seemed an eternity, in which he tried his keys on five different vehicles, the man managed to find his car and fall into it. He sat there for a few minutes as a number of other patrons left the bar and drove off. Finally he started the car, switched the wipers on and off a few times; it was a fine, dry summer night, flicked the blinkers on and off a couple of times, honked the horn and then switched on the lights. He moved the vehicle forward a few inches, reversed a little and then remained still for a few more minutes as some more of the other patrons' vehicles left. At last, when his was the only car left in the parking lot, he pulled out and drove slowly down the road.

The police officer, having waited patiently all this time, now started up his patrol car, put on the flashing lights, promptly pulled the man over and administered a breathalyser test. To his utter amazement, the breathalyser indicated no evidence that the man had consumed any alcohol at all! Dumbfounded, the officer said, "I'll have to ask you to accompany me to the police station. This breathalyser equipment must be broken."

"I doubt it," said the truly proud Redneck. "Tonight I'm the designated decoy."

a lot of small places in north carolina consider drunk driving a sport. Grave Digger, the monster truck driver, put on a mud bog (which is a mud pit about 100 yards or so long that people, or should i say rednecks, drive their lifted up trucks to see who can get the farthest. the actual mud bogging comes around in the afternoon, while the entire day EVERYBODY has been drinking heavily, therefore drinking heavily driving huge lifted up diesels and big gas motors through mud!! no DUI's until you try and drive off the mans property. pretty crazy just thought i'd share that
 
i'm from NC, and i have to say that is likely a true story, we've done that a few times, and the pilot thing was good too!
EK
 

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